Sitting around the campfire

Have you ever been out camping or just in the backyard and built a fire. It's a cool night, the fire is warm and it lights up the area. You can sit there and just stare at the flames and it is as mesmerising as anything in this world.

You sit there and the fire slowly gets lower and lower. At some point there is no flame, just embers. You can watch the embers glow for a long time, sometime brightly and often quite dimly. Every now and then the wind blows smoke your way, not so much as to bother you but just enough to enjoy the rich smell of the the wood.

At some point the fire and all the embers are gone. You go inside and get ready for bed but you rest that night with the visions of the fire and the glow of the embers. You can still smell the smoke and the night air that made such a contrast to the fire. Even though you are no longer near the fire and it does not even exist anymore, it still warms you.

Nonie died last night. As I sat with Sharon and watched Nonie for the last few hours, we had the idea that the end was near. Schedules had been set that assured that Nonie would not be alone until the end. Sharon and I sat there and for long periods of time we really didn't say anything, we watched Nonie.

It reminded me of the campfire. You were warmed by the memory of all the years of Nonie's presences, you had stared for years at the person that she was even after the flames had died down.

I left the nursing home last night knowing that even though Nonie was gone, we will remember her for a long time even after we return to our everyday lives. There will periods of time when we will not think of it, but when we remember the fire that was Nonie, it will comfort us in so many ways.